Brexitballs

An occasional series highlighting people talking bollocks about Brexit.

Jean-Claude Junker
”It will cost you £60billion to leave the EU” – met with laughter by the PM

Gina Miller on the General Election
“An elected dictatorship is not a democracy” – but apparently an unelected one is just fine!

Vince Cable
“We are heading towards a dangerous one party state” – thankfully not the Lib Dems?

Nicola Sturgeon
“Scotland can remain in the EU” – even though the majority of Scots don’t support a new referendum

Richard Branson, billionaire tax exile
“The referendum was just an advisory referendum. Once people see the terms and the consequences of what’s happening, things could change”

The Independent
“Majority of British voters believe Brexit was wrong decision, poll finds. Figures reveal 45 per cent of electorate oppose leaving the EU”
So, the 48% are now 45% and that supports the view we should remain?!? Duh…!

Contributions to this thread are welcomed…

Operation desert storm

You might have gathered from the lack of posting that I’m on holiday. Actually I am in Namibia writing this on cheapo tablet so excuse the typos!

I’m sat in a bar in Sussuvlei in the Namib desert drinking free beer. It’s free because we are stuck in a sand storm and they can’t fly us out so we are royally buggered for now.

So, we lay back and think of England and enjoy the free booze!

Sand storms are a cunt!..

Trump good. Assad bad.


I seem to be missing something?

It seems that Assad – allegedly – gassing 70 ‘women and children’ civilians in Idlib is a war crime and a crime against humanity. Trump-etting on about the ‘beautiful babies’ murdered by the wicked Assad – allegedly – requires an ‘appropriate and measured response’ from the USA by chucking 59 cruise missiles at an empty air base from which the ‘alleged’ chemical strike was ‘allegedly’ launched.

However, it does seem to be OK for the USAF to blow the living shit out of three times that number in Mosul using their nice eco-friendly non chemical bombs. The number of beautifully babies pulled out of the rubble there seems to be perfectly acceptable because we blew them up instead of gassing them.

So – Trump good, Assad bad. America good, Assad bad.

I condemn the USA for sticking it’s nose into Syria. Equally I condemn Russia for doing the same thing. It would be best for all if both countries pulled out and let the Syrians get on with their internal conflict without external interference. It is, after all, their affair and none of our business.

But no. Now America is banging on about regime change – because that worked so well in Iraq and Afghanistan didn’t it?

Brexit Negotiator in Chief…


The problem with this Brexit negotiation thing is that we’ve not got the right man in charge.

I’d like to offer my services and set out my stall as follows :

(1) We’re quite happy with WTO tariffs on the basis that we’ll make money out of it. Our currency is lower so even after applying the tariffs, our goods are cheaper while yours are more expensive.

(2) We’ve taken legal advice and owe you nothing so that’s what you’re getting. If you want to argue, we’ll withdraw our funds from the ECB

(3) We’ve got GCHQ so if you don’t want our intelligence, that’s fine. Your loss.

(4) Our people have the right to remain in the EU after 5 years residency, but we’re pulling out so yours get no such protection. Want to sign a deal or not?

(5) We’re not even going to consider discussing Gibraltar until the Spanish give Ceuta back to Morocco

(6) You want free movement? No. You can come here to work if you get a work visa. You want to live here, apply for a residency visa.

(7) The UK Supreme Court is the highest recognized court in the UK. The ECJ is irrelevant to us. We’ve left the EU.

(8) Common fisheries policy no longer applies. We’ve left the EU. Get your trawlers out of our waters.

(9) Refugees are supposed to stop in the first safe country, so we’re not letting any in. The EU border stops at Calais.

(10) You need to use the NHS while you’re in the UK? Fine. Bring a credit card and pay up front.

(11) Do you want Scotland? If so, tell them and then they can vote on it.

I understand the word ‘No’ and know how to use it and stick to it. Thatcher knew that as well.

I think I could do a pretty good job. I’ll even do it for no wages. Can’t say fairer than that, so how about it?...

Brexitballs

An occasional series highlighting people talking bollocks about Brexit.

Sky interviewing a remoaner
”I see myself as European firstly and English secondly” 

Angela Merkel
“We have a lot to learn from asylum seekers”

Alistair Campbell
“The 48% are a significant majority”

Nicola Sturgeon
“There is no mandate for this Brexit”

Tim Farron
“We can stop Brexit by shouting from rooftops”

Alistair Campbell
“It’s not too late to stop this madness. Article 50 can be reversed”

Contributions to this thread are welcomed…