My regular couple of readers might have noticed that I’ve not posted much lately. One of them might have wondered why. Well, to be honest I’ve had other things on my mind and, frankly, I probably forgot. Things at Chateau D are not all that bright and beautiful at the moment.
It started slowly. Mrs D was wondering if I was ignoring her – always a rather risky thing to do – but I wasn’t. I just didn’t always hear her or catch what she said. So she nagged on about getting a hearing test. Being an obstinate old bastard, I resisted as long as I could then gave in. Off I toddled to Boots for a free test. They said come back for a second one. Then tried to convince me to spend £2,500 on a set of hearing aids. Bugger that, thought I so on the advise of a friend I asked my GP to refer me to the local hospital. Apart from anything else, I wanted a second opinion from somebody who didn’t have a vested interest in selling me the damned things.
Anyway, to cut a short story long I am now the proud owner of a shiny new pair of NHS hearing aids. Just like the ones in Boots, but £2,500 cheaper and with free ongoing maintenance and batteries. I can hear a lot better, but this is not always a good thing!
Then yesterday I went to the opticians for my annual check up. She confirmed that the cataract in my right eye is progressing – thankfully slowly – but that I now have one in my left eye as well. So we’ve tackled the hearing, but the sight is an ongoing problem. Marvellous.
But am I worried about all this? Well, I am in my lucid moments. This morning I tried to put toothpaste on the shaver. Then I tried to put toothpaste on the electric toothbrush without putting the head on it first. It doesn’t work too well like that. When I did remember the head, I put my wife’s pink one on instead of my blue one. So far today has not been going well…
So deaf, blind and gaga. Not a great prospect is it? Even less of a great prospect for Mrs D as she’s the poor sod who is having to put up with my somewhat erratic behaviour.
At least now I can hear her complaining about it – when I remember to put the hearing aids in, of course – and for now I can see when she throws things at me (only joking, darling!). Hopefully it’ll be a goodly while before I’m too far gone to notice or care, and to be honest I worry more about what all this is doing to her rather than to me.
Old age and decline is a bastard. I wouldn’t mind but I’m only bloody 66…