I went down there and bought 6 bottles for £6.00 each. No bother. I went to the till and paid. Then before I left the store I thought “That doesn’t sound right?” and it wasn’t. They charged me £6.98 a bottle instead – so I went to the cashier and queried it. A girl went to the shelf with me and there it was : £6 a bottle so I said I’d been overcharged so gimme my six odd quids back.
“Can’t do that” she says. “Not able to do that on the tills. You either accept the £7 or we’ll give you your money back.” I’m a reasonable bloke. Not her fault. “Manager” says I. “Now please” and out comes some spotty faced kid who is apparently the manager of the wine department. “I’ll check the price” says he and buggers off. Five minutes later, back he comes and declares that the price I’ve been charged is correct and the price shown on the shelf is wrong. Again I’m told accept it or take a full refund. FFS!
“Store manager” says I. “Now please.” “Not available” I’m told. How convenient. “Here’s a solution” I suggest. “Just give me a gratis bottle so I have 7 at effectively £6 instead of 6 at £7.” Seems reasonable. It’s called customer service.
“Can’t do that” says he. “Messes up me stock control.” FFS again! “So” says I holding out a bottle at arms length, “what happens if I drop this and it smashes. How does your stock control handle that?” “That’s shrinkage” says he. “These things happen!” “So let’s pretend it happened this time and we can all go away happy?”
“Can’t do that” says he. FFS! FFS! I’m starting to lose it now! “So” I continues, “do you never have any wine stolen from your store that makes your figure wrong?” “That’s shrinkage” says he. I’m getting bloody nowhere and beginning to think that the major shrinkage is in this idiot’s brain cavity?…
“But it’s £6 on your website” says I, “and it’s click and collect. So if I put these 6 bottles back on the shelf and then go on line and order 6 bottles off your website, I get the same physical bottles from the same shelf in the same store for £6! What’s the problem.”
“That’s OK” says the moron. “The prices on the website aren’t necessarily the prices in the store.” “But it’s the self same actual physical bottles FFS!” “Yes, but you bought them on line not in the store – you just collected them from the store.”
So I’m marched down to the customer services desk where I’m ignored for around 15 minutes due to the queue of similarly pissed off customers, they refund my money and I piss off home without any wine.
What a bunch of fucking idiots…