Pointless technology: Bluetooth coffee machines

Just once in a while, technology comes up with something completely pointless and impractical. Such a case is the new Nespresso Prodigio coffee maker.

The Prodigio is a bluetooth enabled coffee making machine, a must have gadget that can be yours for a mere £159. So what exactly do you get for your dosh? Well, by using a special app, you can now make coffee using your smartphone.

Apparently you can schedule a cup of coffee and track your Nespresso capsule stocks. Marvellous. But I have a question or two…

For example, how does this marvellous piece of technology take the capsule put of the cupboard and out it in the machine? How does it top up the water container? How does it put the milk in the frother? How does it put the cup under the nozzle? How does it put sugar in the coffee? He does it sprinkle those sexy chocolate bits on the top?

The point is that if I have to insert a capsule and place the cup then I’m stood next to the machine and there’s a button to push at arms length, so why would I use my phone to turn it on? And even if I accept that I could preload it all, then what if the better half wants a cup too? Then I’m back to square one aren’t I?

No, there is absolutely no point whatsoever in connecting your coffee machine to your phone. They’re doing it just because they can and until they invent a robot barista it’s totally impractical.

But it doesn’t matter, because the gadget geeks will be queuing up to buy it…


11 responses to “Pointless technology: Bluetooth coffee machines

  1. A friend recently complained that her gimmicky coffee machine had stopped working because it needed descaling. I helpfully pointed out that my Tesco stainless steel coffee press needed only a rinse and a quick wipe after each use. There followed several “Ah, buts”; I carried on drinking coffee while she waited for the descaler to work . . .

    • I have a water softener so descaling is not a problem. However it should be perhaps pointed out to your friend that
      (a) it’s a good idea to read the instructions
      (b) you do actually have to clean the bloody thing every so often!

  2. Like that control your home from your phone nonsense. Why?

  3. These “extras” on basic equipments, and there are many infesting shops now, are all based on invented problems to justify unnecessary technology. It’s quite funny to watch the ignorant and uneducated, i.e., young people, being suckered in to buying such crap.

  4. Kath Lissenden

    SIGH…. and to think somewhere some moron is paid good money to invent this shit, and even more worryingly someone somewhere with more money than sense is ordering one of these pointless items right now, no doubt to end up in landfill at some point in the future!
    It’s official the day has come I am admitting to be a moaning old bag!!! (not news to many out there I realise!)

  5. I have a Tefal toaster that makes me a boiled egg to go with my toast. It does this by steaming it. It has a little tray into which you put a tiny bit of water from a little measuring cup, it boils it dry and then switches off, so the more water you put in the harder your egg is. It is a genuinely useful toy and I use it every morning, so sometimes inventors get it right.

  6. Now here’s a useful machine. Just think how much maple syrup you could get on a 3 meter pancake!