What I got for Christmas

Clearly somebody thought I was missing Norway.
Thanks a lot, Lidl…

14 responses to “What I got for Christmas

  1. Yep, I got a load of shit. My best pressie was a gift card; I bought two good books.

  2. I received absolutely nothing and spent the christian holiday raking remnants of the house roof that blew off in the christmas eve windstorm. This global warming shite is for reals. The temperature was +15C on the 24th of December. Normal would be about -10C.

    You bourgeois conspicuous consuming cunts will be amongst the first against the wall when the revolution comes.

    Just south of my present location is a Bison farm where one might, if one is so inclined, purchase Bison Steaks and/or ground meat for Bison Burgers. They are very good; not gamey tasting at all. I've had Moose, which I reckon is similar to Reindeer, and I was not impressed – too gamey.

  3. I got some David Beckham mens after shave stuff which will sting like fuck if it was too ever get near my sensitive skin and a too small mens pyjama set, a chocolate snowman and some money.

    Best bit so far for me was “on the buses” film today and 2 young men on the tills at the local Co-op who both had dyed hair in a ladies hairstyle which meant one eye on both of them was covered by hair.

    What the fuck is all that about?.


  4. Q: What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
    A: You can't wash yer 'ands in a buffalo…

  5. You're supposed to put in on your face not your privates, Rickie…

  6. It works with a Blackcountry accent, ay it?

  7. Only in the East End of the black country 😉

  8. I'm to understand that is some sort of accent/pronunciation joke? Where the folk from this 'Black Country' pronounce the word Bison such that it is audibly indistinguishable from their not-exactly-Received Pronunciation of the word basin?
    Where is this Black Country?

    That “Batmon” cunt was unintelligible!

  9. I think I love this Black Country.

  10. Batmon speaks just like my ol granddad.

  11. Black Country is the West Midlands. There's an old joke about a kipper tie (two sugars, please…). So called because it is at the heart of the old industrial revolution. All that coal, you see.

  12. Thanks, Longrider, I know you mean well, but that description doesn't fuckin' help. Where the fuck are the West Midlands?

    Give me the name of the capital city of the Black Country! Or sommat like Bow Bells for Cockneys, but for Black Country folk. I know it's north of Birmingham 'cause Doreen mentions Birmingham as being in the south.

  13. Birmingham, Wolverhampton, Dudley and Sandwell, that area. The West Midlands is the county.

  14. Longrider, you forgot good ol Tipton…..