Migrants in English Channel

News from the English Channel yesterday as a boat load of men were spotted in the English Channel off Dover.

The boat was intercepted by the Coastguard but surprisingly it was not heading to, but away from the UK, towards Calais.

Another surprise finding was that it was loaded with white British Citizens, who were all seniors of pensionable age.

They claim they were trying to get out of the EU so as to be able to return to the UK later as illegal immigrants, and therefore be entitled to far more benefits than they were receiving as legitimate British pensioners.

They were given food and water and assisted safely on their journey.

We are booking on the next boat out.

Let me know if you want to come…


10 responses to “Migrants in English Channel

  1. You got it right with the Coastguard, there's no Navy left!

  2. Right! I can see a few flaws in this story which, though separately would not cause a problem, but considered together lead me to question the verisimilitude of this dross.

    1) Are not all seniors of pensionable age? In the Canadas, you ain't a 'senior' until you are able to collect a pension.

    2) If they wanted to leave the EU, would they not have to row to Norway or Faroe or Iceland? France is a EU country and according to the Refugee Agreements, those Britishcritters would have to register as asylum seekers there – IN FRANCE? Are they nuts? The folks who would register them are either on strike or contemplating a strike and as a consequence, working-to-rule. The Britishcritter Asylum Seekers will get no Perrier, no baguette, nowt. The rosbif-mzungu-Brittunculi will perish!

  3. But yins a cunt. Nuff said.

  4. The problem regarding Refugee Agreements is one thing, the absolute certainty that if 12 British pensioners decided to get on a french bus they would make the drivers life a misery over arguments about their town council leisure discount card which enables 10% of many local services should apply in France too.

    Honestly my mother got her local swimming pool identity card out and tried to barter with a tourist boat owner in Porto for a discount.

    Back to Bus drivers please spare a thought every day at 9.30am for it is the time the free travel for pensioners begins with nasty spiteful mental torture attacks on drivers before they get to Primark.


  5. Ricky, I agree. Purchase a silenced pistol off the 'Deep Web' and carefully shoot the old folk as they try to alight on da bus. No one will miss the old cunts as they smell of piss and shit.

  6. Off the 'Deep Web'?
    Buy one on eBay in the States and have it mailed to you.
    Sheesh, You Europeans are so out of it.

  7. Better a cunt than a 'nasty little Briton'

  8. Just take out the 2 attack dog bitches at the front of the queue, they have been whipping the rest of the passengers into a frenzy so they all have a pop at him when they get on, the student with headphones on looking confused at the ruck is an innocent bystander.

    At this time of the year the cunts can be identified by poppies attached to their jackets disguised as decent charitable folks .

    Its a nasty game played out every day cos the old cunts know full well that every bus stop at 9.30 am will have likeminded cunts all moaning at the driver and therefore the bus is never on time… its groundhog day every day.


  9. I'm in too. I'll bring my boat along, and we can push off the Channel Islands (outside EU)