93 Men in a Boat [60] : The Luggage Losers

Just once in a while you hear a story that is so bizarre that it just has to be true. This is one such occasion…

Once upon a time, a bunch of American (natch!) tourists arrive from the good old U.S. of A. to tour Australia. The tour guide duly meets them at the airport and hustles them onto the coach getting them to check their bags into the hold. Two of them are looking pretty unhappy, as their bags aren’t there.

Turning to the guide, they yell “You lost our luggage!”

The guide is rather nonplussed at this. ” I lost your luggage!?” she retorts and tootles off into the airport to see what she can find out. Returned a short time later, having asked all the right questions, she turns to the couple and says “Give me your baggage tags.” “What baggage tags?” they reply.

Exasperated the guide says “They’re stuck to your boarding passes. Show me those” and they are duly thrust into her hands. There are no baggage tags. WTF?

More questions ensue. Then comes the cruncher: “When did you last see your luggage?” she enquires.

“It was on our porch in Oregon” they reply. “And you’ve lost it!”

“Why the hell did you leave it on the porch and why is this my fault?!?”

“Read your brochure, honey. It clearly says ‘we take care of the luggage’!”


6 responses to “93 Men in a Boat [60] : The Luggage Losers

  1. Having worked on cruise ships for years I can well believe this. I had a theory that if the Americans were overweight, (luggage!) they would leave their brain behind. I fully remember being asked, as Hotel Manager, “what do you do with the ice-carvings when they melt”? Also “is the water in the pool salt or fresh as it has waves on it.” “Does this elevator go all the way to the front of the ship?” “Do the crew live on board or do they fly you in every morning?” Yanks, love 'em. And to think that only the top 30% have passports! God help us.

  2. “And to think that only the top 30% have passports! God help us.”

    Maybe that should be “Thank God!”?

  3. Here's a whole list I did earlier : http://dioclese.blogspot.co.uk/2011/04/silly-question.html
    I seem to remember a second post as well about the same time. Priceless aren't they?

  4. Yep, some folk are irredeemably stupid it makes your teeth itch- don't scratch.

  5. These Yankees have a point. If the brochure does state that the “Company” takes care of the luggage then they damn well better. In The Great Satan, these folks would win a lawsuit against the Tour Operator
    And don't be so hard on the less intellectually endowed, much of their idiocy keeps many of us employed.