End of the road…

It was a long night. It seems I was right about a Lib Dem wipe out and an SNP landslide. I should get a job as a political guru…

22:30 – The exit polls forecasting 316 seats for the Tories and the SNP winning all but one seat in Scotland. The one saving grace was that even with the SNP in tow, Miliband has no majority with a predicted 239 seats. At this stage, I am beginning to breathe a sign of relief – but it’s not over yet!

22:50 – First result in in Sunderland. No surprise that Labour held the seat, but the Lib Dems only got 791 votes, finished 5th behind the Greens and lost their deposit. UKIP do well by coming 2nd forcing the Tories into 3rd place. 56% turnout is not too shabby in a safe seat and it looks like UKIP is going to feature largely in this result one way or another.

23:15 – Second result, again in Sunderland, puts the Lib Dems 5th once more and another lost deposit. Looks like Lib Dems are deserting the sinking ship and going across to UKIP. Big swings to UKIP seem to be on the cards but thanks to our wonderful voting system they won’t get a lot of seats. There’s rumours that Ed Balls might lose his seat which, if true, at least means he won’t be around to wreck the economy! Fingers crossed…

23:37 – Ed Balls is on the Beeb living up to his name. I’ll go and make a cuppa or I’m in danger of chucking something at the screen!

00:17 – Bloody hell! Now Mrs Balls is living up to her husbands name. Seems the official Labour line is focusing on the Coalition losing it’s majority to minimise the attention on them losing seats. Smoke and mirrors…

00:40 – Interesting comment from Mandleson who is now referring to the Conservative Party as English Nationalists! Alan Johnson is still taking the line that the exit poll is unbelievable. Time will tell.

02:12 – The first Scottish result comes in from Kilmarnock and the SNP take it from Labour with a 26% swing. First Labour blood goes to the SNP.

02:21 – The SNP get rid of the Shadow Foreign Secretary, Douglas Alexander and just to rub it in the winner is a 20 year old student! That’s a 27% swing against Labour and the youngest MP since 1667. Things are getting interesting up north! I’m reminded of the 17% swing that unseated Michael Portillo which was regarded as sensational at the time. It’s got nothing on the SNP.

02:52 – The Lib Dems lose their first seat to the Tories. The electorate really seem to dislike the Lib Dems. There’s a surprise! Time they disappeared. If it wasn’t for the SDP they’ve have been gone years ago.

03:11 – Another SNP scalp in the form of Jim Murphy. If the leader of the Scottish Labour Party can’t hold his seat then I think we can right them off in Scotland. Meanwhile, ‘senior Labour ‘
sources’ are saying that Miliband has to go! Hurrah!

03:20 – There’s 100 seats declared and the results are coming in more slowly than usual, probably because of the increased turnout. So far, the forecast has not deviated from the exit poll so I’m off to bed and we’ll see where we are in the morning.

06:10 – Well, still about 175 seats to go and I wake up to the news that Danny Alexander, Simon Hughes, Ed Davey, Charles Kennedy and Vince Cable have lost their seats. Douglas Carswell has won for UKIP and Nigel Farage is still sweating it out and hours away from a result.
It’s been the predicted wipe out for the Lib Dems and I’m especially delighted that David Laws has been kicked out because after being kicked out in disgrace, they sneaked him back in when they thought we weren’t watching.
And while we’re at it, we’ve got rid of George Galloway as well. I’m amazed he’s hung on this long but at least he’s finally gone. Good riddance to bad rubbish!
The travesty seems to be that UKIP have gained 3.5 million votes, got around 12% of the popular vote, and look set to get a couple of seats. The SNP get 1.5 million votes and get at least 55 seats. It can’t be right, can it?

06:30 – Mark Reckless loses to the Tories. Not really a surprise. Reckless by name and it seems reckless by nature. Latest poll prediction is 325 for the Tories, but that could still go a few either way. Cameron will retain the keys to number 10.

With a bit of luck we’ll see the back of Miliband and Clegg after this so as far as I’m concerned it’s been a good night. UKIP has come second in over 90 seats and failed to break through due to the election system, but it’s progress of a sort.

So the big question as I make myself a cup of tea and take it up to Mrs D is whether the Tories will command a majority. We’ll find out later…

+ + + + UPDATE + + + + 

08:30 – YES! YES! YES! Ed Balls has lost his seat. I’m so happy they’re still scraping me off the ceiling!!!! One Ed down, one to go…

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15 responses to “End of the road…

  1. Recount in Balls constituency called for by Labour, I do hope Balls loses his seat, that would be hilarious.
    Shame Caroline Lucas retained Brighton but at least the Limp Dumps are decimated even in Cornwall. and nice to see George Galloway finally out.
    I noted Red Ken was doing his usual focus shifting.
    Shame that although UKIP got good vote numbers nationally , this didn't translate to seats.
    Locally UKIP gained ground on Labour an the Labour candidate lost ground but still walked it with over 8k majority. I noticed that Osbourne is already claiming a “Mandate” from voters for more of the same, so they are still missing the point.
    I do think the threat to Westminster from the fish woman in the untamed North had an effect on the Tory vote.
    Oh well thats it for another 4 years, THANK FK.

  2. Ed Balls MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA OUSTED! The best result of the night.

  3. Abso-bloody-lutely!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. As I refuse point blank to watch TV or listen to the wireless I had to rely on t'internet for coverage and results. Therefore I've only just found out via your blog that cunthooks Balls has been fooked off! Well that's made my day! I've waited a very long time to see some sort of pay-back for the Tory rout in 1997, when the likes of Portillo and Mellor were given the order of the boot. By the by, is it just me or does anyone else find t'internet is shit for election news and results? Or do you need to use Twatter or Faecesbook for more instant information?

    Lovely to see the Liberals all but wiped out – a shame Clegg was not one of them. Wonderful to see UKIP's share of the vote increase, but a great pity thar won't be reflected in the number of seats they end up with. I do hope the Nigel farage stays on as party leader.

    All in all, a huge sigh of relief that we are not facing an SNP/Labour coalition.

  5. I agree with your comment 100% Eye sad to see Farage lost in Thanet, I too hope he decides to stay.

  6. I agree with Kath. Oooo – beginning to sound like Gordon Brown in the last election debate 😉

  7. Who predicted a Con maj/ Milliband/Clegg and Probably Farage resigning….nobody…no-one.

    It seems the general public have stuck two fingers up to the pollsters, political experts,media and bloggers etc who think the sheeple/drones do whats expected of them in some trance like state.

    I reckon Labour now need a woman leader with a Nicola sturgeon effect, and not some Ed balls lookalike that reminds everyone of John prescott

    Lib dems are completely fucked for good with their centre ground mularky which nobody really ever knew what it was.

    UkIP without Farage are fucked and will collapse.

    Hopefully somebody will take UKIP's 5 million votes on immigration issues and do something about it.

    Back to Con/lab and 2 horse race elections.

    Rickie

  8. As usual, 'Flaxen Saxon' winging it without medication, is as bewildered as usual. Has that nice Mr Atley, got in?

  9. Who predicted a Con maj/ Milliband/Clegg and Probably Farage resigning….nobody…no-one.

    Jackart did.

  10. Sadly not Flaxon 😦 shame really I like Atley.

  11. I do think Cameron's canny pushing of the dangers of a lab/SNP coalition helped somewhat, I have never agreed with Clegg but what he said in his resignation speech was right this election was fought and won on fear of nationalism, and I am all for it, hoorah. I heard Farage say he will consider re-application as leader and I hope he does, UKIP is rather a one trick pony and without Nige are doomed, but those votes were not wasted UKIP finished second more often than the others and often beat limp dumps and labour into 3/4 place. Hardly their fault that this first past the post system stymies an handicaps them when translated into seats in the commons. And the UKIP vote was definitely up in most places. I think UKIP can be very pleased with their showing this time. Will it ever happen again …hmm I'm doubtful.

  12. Well I'm still enjoying my schadenfreude-fest at the unemployment of one Edward Balls Esq.
    Hehehe! Giggle & chortle…

  13. Still smiling here about Labour’s demise and so grateful Ed Miliband isn’t sleeping in No 10 tonight. That from a supporter of Scottish independence too! 😀

  14. Rick Astley? I would have voted…